Be You Not Your Body.

10330472_10202148824996167_255312717595625119_nThis is me, I posted it online, on my personal social media websites & I’m okay with it. I actually expected people to be mean but they weren’t, didn’t bash me. Even if they did, I would be okay.

As I said before this is me being honest with you, you maybe a complete stranger or an acquaintance of mine. I’m completely fine with that.

I am overweight and my BMI considers me Obese. I don’t mind what people say of me, diminishing me because of my weight. It doesn’t hurt me anymore. I just care of what I think of my body. I’m not absolutely proud of my body, but I am still working on it. Not for anyone but myself, because I want to feel happy and healthy.

If you want to wear something. Wear it. If its shorts or a tank top. Wear it! If you are comfortable. Wear whatever you want! Wear what you want to wear Despite your weight, stretch marks cellulite, and scars. It makes you, you. It’s your body, your life, it is nobody else! Think of all those “flaws” as your battle scars, show people you are proud of it, show people your history. Weight shows you love food (like a ton of people do) and you probably have a slow metabolism. (Truthfully everyone has stretch marks, extra fat, and you don’t need excuses).

But If you aren’t proud of your body, there are many ways to change that. You could eat healthier, exercise (start small), use scar therapy lotion, use cellulite scrubs. The list is endless. It does take a lot of time and hard work, but it’s worth it, you will start feeling better inside and out. But if you absolutely cant fix something because health problems, that’s understandable and that’s okay.

If you really want something to change and don’t have a health reason why you cant do it. There’s no other reason why you shouldn’t go for it. You really don’t get anywhere with wishful thinking.

This isn’t telling you how to live your life or telling you to change yourself. Just wear what you want to wear. Try to be comfortable with your skin! You shouldn’t care what other people think of you, because they don’t determine your ending. Your body is yours, and no body elses. Confidence is key. It sounds so cliche but its very true. walk with your head high, posture straight. You will rock whatever you’ve had in your mind for weeks!

I’ve learned to love myself, but you won’t see me have a huge ego. I learned that if you don’t like yourself, other people can see that, and we give ourselves negative energies, making things worse. We aren’t put on this earth to let other people rule our lives. It gets hard taking in all the bad energies from other people, people are mean, and give negative comments. Show them and yourself that you are okay. They don’t determine your well being.

If you want shorts in the Summer. If you want leggings and sweaters in the fall. Wear it! Living in Florida, there is unexpected weather changes all day. Despite what meteorologists say. Being, humid, raining, and slightly sunny at the same time. Or raining and then being sunny and humid minutes later. And in the winter some days the low is 60 and yet 90s in its high. Even days its ranging in 60s/70s, then the very next day its in the 90’s. Its gets quite confusing! But I want to be completely comfortable with whatever I choose to wear. Being comfortable with your wardrobe and yourself is the whole point.

Tell me if the weather is different or the same where you live in the comments. I would actually love to know. I travel once a year to multiple places for a very short time, so I don’t really know if the weather is consistent or confusing anywhere else.

I can’t stress this enough, but you are not your body! Your weight, your battle scars don’t define you nor your personality, it doesn’t define who you’ve grown up to be. It lets us affect our lives negatively because we let it, we our overcome with fear that we aren’t good enough. I let my weight and my body bring me down, define who I was, and it all just made me feel worse, it made me so sad. You could be confident and overweight. People will look up to you for it! I will look up to you for it! Don’t define yourself by your weight, Once people see your confidence and see that you don’t it define you, They believe in you, they see you overcome it, and see you are comfortable, they won’t even notice your weight behind your beautiful personality.

Be who you have grown up to be. Don’t be your weight!

I don’t think I would wear short shorts and just a crop top in public, I don’t really like that style, and I’m personally don’t like showing too much cleavage. But if you like any kind of style, wear it, because you are the one who likes it.

I have never fit in the BMI “normal” category. I am 5’3 and around 180 pounds. I’m definitely not happy with it but I’m coming to love my body a lot more than I did before. But I am also working out and eating better. It’s not easy, but in life nothing ever is.

Whenever you see celebrities bodies in magazines, and pictures, etc. Try to remember nobody’s body is that perfect most of the time. They even use Photoshop.

Sincerely Yours Jolee G

What is Happiness? What is Content?

Are you happy or content?

* these are all my opinions. You can speak your mind in the comments as well. I won’t bash them. & I don’t want anyone to bash each other.

I didn’t realize it before, but I have had a feeling for a long while, but there is a difference between happiness, and content.
But still looking at multiple dictionaries, content and happiness seem to have similar definitions.
But If I ask you
Would you rather be content or happy?
I’m sure your answer would be happy.
Also when I was looking for the definitions of happiness. There was a graph of the times happiness was mentioned in the last 200 years. The horrifying truth was that we are using the word happy around the same amount of times as the great depression used it (I understand there are theories believing we in another great depression generation but I don’t believe that to be true). And during the times of WWI, happy was mentioned more.

 

I'm not making this up. Enter "happiness definition" into Google Search books.google.com/ngrams
I’m not making this up. Enter “happiness definition” into Google Search
books google ngrams

 

 

For me,
Being a state of contentment would be you are secure. Secure with your finances, with your job, with your safety and family. Or the fact you are enjoying the things happening right now, material things.

My definition of  happy, means you aren’t afraid to die (not trying to be morbid). But knowing what happens next and what comes after death won’t absolutely give you a heart attack. Not worrying every single second of your life. That’s being happy for me I’m not saying you have to be spiritual and you have to label yourself a certain religion or even believe in god or anything. I’m saying maybe you have to be okay with anything that happens next. That you believe everything happens for a reason, and every single thing that comes to you only makes you stronger. Yes you will have unexpected stops a long the road. but you shouldn’t mourn about them forever.

I won’t lie to you. I’m not happy. I’m not even sure I’m content most of the time. I’ve had my fair share of sadness, and episodes but I’m good. & you probably think I’m a hypocrite now, and that’s fine. If you think you are happy, or any ideas please tell me what happiness means. I’d understand your point.

Seeing the unexpected stops to happen to my family within the last year compared to stops of the last 3 years of our life. They been completely different, and seeing them, makes me want to be like them and be happy. They have had incredibly difficult pauses but they didn’t mourn about it, move on, and mourn some more. Or mourn and mourn about it and not do anything at all, like many people do.

Truthfully I’m not really sure what I would tell to you if you were okay with what happens next and sad. But I don’t think you would be both, because I don’t think being spiritual would make you sad.

Of course you should use being happy as “I am happy” or that has made me happy. As the feeling, what its meant to be. I’m not saying you have to be spiritual to be happy.
Maybe there are even 2 definitions of happy, in my mind. Maybe there is a difference between a state of happiness or being happy. I’m sorry if this has been confusing

In reference to another one of my posts ‘Your Enchanted Forest’*. I believe everyone has to take time to do some good for themselves, and have an effort to make themselves at least feel happy, we get lost in our priorities, of course they are important but your well being is too. It seems depression sneaks up when we ignore our happy needs. For me I feel good to bake and create something, read, even nap for a couple of hours.

What I’m trying to say with this whole thing is if you are feeding the need to be happy, even with the many moments you had of feeling happy. Maybe you have to be okay with your end.

I guess you can be happy and content, you can even be happy or content. And even happy (feeling), happy, and content. But don’t try to convince me that content and happy are the same, like many dictionaries.

*Your Enchanted Forest: https://sincerelyjoleeg.wordpress.com/2014/10/23/the-enchanted-forest/

Do you want be happy, happy, or content?

I really hope by your end you do find your happiness, even if its not the way I think. Everyone deserves to be happy.

Sincerely yours Jolee G